I always hated math most of my life being horrible at it and getting discouraged because of the complexity. In middle/high school all I wanted to do was mess around with friends and concentrate on things that mattered like hanging out with friends, drinking, smoking cigarettes, and being in the school band. Very little else mattered at that age, as it should. I guess being a normal teenager involves being a rebel and forging individuality. Math, and school in general was very low on my list of things I cared about.
Around my sophomore year of high school, I jokingly asked my math teacher if she thought I could be a nuclear physicist. She answered that if my dedication to being a rebel could be redirected into loving school and using intelligence instead of burning it out, I could most definitely be a nuclear physicist. I never expected that response from a teacher that enjoyed giving me F’s and took pleasure in giving me detentions for not showing up. Little did I know that her response would happen unlike any of Nostradamus predictions.
Senior year came around and I realized that I had to make it into college. With my crap grades I was going to end up anywhere. So, I started to care and managed to get straight A’s that year. I won a spot at the public college of the area Florida International University. That year of trying sparked a realization that if I care just a little bit, I could get myself to work wonders. I promised myself that if I was going to waste my parent’s money on college, I was going to try my hardest to do my best to find something challenging to do. A lot of my friends chose easy majors, but I would dance around the sciences always picking the hardest subject I could manage.
Back to my math adventure. Sorry for the long intro. My freshman year of college I had to start taking remedial classes in math because I was that bad at it. Slowly I started to appreciate what I once hated. As I studied more science, I realized that a lot of what stitches together science is math. Math applied everywhere in my collegiate world! So, the last thing I thought would happen did. I found math like people find Jesus! I couldn’t get enough. I took all of the math classes you can take in your first two years without being a math major. That’s a lot of math. I found peace in calculation, and elegance in logic and proofs. My life started making more sense, and I actually had fun studying things like calculus eight to ten hours a day. I found myself passing classes that most would fail. I had enough credits for a minor in math, so I tried other more practical fields of study that were math related. I finally settled on computer science math double major when I got sick and had to quit. No looking back now, but it was fun while it lasted!
Fast forward to today! I have found myself a nice month of stability allowing me to dedicate myself to serious study of one subject. Usually at this point I have picked web design or programming in general so that I have some chance of getting a tech job in the future. I have even studied general IT and tried to get my certifications. Unfortunately, a lot of those things don’t make me happy, and I just do them for the potential job opportunity. This time around I chose to try doing math just for fun. I can’t go to school, and I’m as close to a job in technology as I am to school. I would need at least six months of stability to even consider either avenue. So, I figure let me do something I like for now until I get better.
I have been studying math for that past few days and it feels like falling in love all over again. Yea I’m a nerd, but I’m proud of that! Watch I’ll get sick of math in a week and quit. Sometimes just being able to enjoy things in the moment is worth more than anything else. I’d figure I’d share my math honeymoon stage with you guys.